Marriage in Real Life
Respect: One of the Cornerstones of a Thriving Marriage
Ever wondered how God-centered marriages withstand life's greatest challenges? Join us as we celebrate life's milestones, including the end of the school year and a granddaughter's high school graduation. We take a reflective moment to honor Memorial Day and the sacrifices of veterans and their families. Then, we dive into the heart of our discussion by sharing personal stories that reveal how marriage uncovers hidden aspects of ourselves, leading to mutual growth and encouragement.
Discover the bedrock of a strong marriage by keeping God at the center, as emphasized in Psalms 127:1. We unravel the true meaning of love, contrasting it with Hollywood’s often superficial portrayal, focusing instead on the virtues highlighted in 1 Corinthians 13:4-6. Our conversation also delves into the importance of premarital counseling, openness, and trust. Learn how a genuine relationship with God can transform your marriage, equipping you to face temptations and struggles with unwavering commitment and agape love.
We tackle the controversial topic of submission within marriage from a biblical viewpoint, exploring the need for mutual respect and Christ-like love. Addressing misconceptions, we emphasize the importance of a balanced understanding that prioritizes love and respect, especially in avoiding abusive situations. By sharing inspiring stories of perseverance and spiritual growth, we demonstrate how mutual support, prayer, and leading by example are vital for a thriving and respectful marriage. Tune in for insightful discussions on navigating the spiritual and practical aspects of marriage, culminating in heartfelt thanks to our listeners for their unwavering support.
Watch the live show on Youtube.
Follow us on Facebook & Instagram at @marriageinreallifepodcast
Ever wondered how God-centered marriages withstand life's greatest challenges? Join us as we celebrate life's milestones, including the end of the school year and a granddaughter's high school graduation. We take a reflective moment to honor Memorial Day and the sacrifices of veterans and their families. Then, we dive into the heart of our discussion by sharing personal stories that reveal how marriage uncovers hidden aspects of ourselves, leading to mutual growth and encouragement.
Discover the bedrock of a strong marriage by keeping God at the center, as emphasized in Psalms 127:1. We unravel the true meaning of love, contrasting it with Hollywood’s often superficial portrayal, focusing instead on the virtues highlighted in 1 Corinthians 13:4-6. Our conversation also delves into the importance of premarital counseling, openness, and trust. Learn how a genuine relationship with God can transform your marriage, equipping you to face temptations and struggles with unwavering commitment and agape love.
We tackle the controversial topic of submission within marriage from a biblical viewpoint, exploring the need for mutual respect and Christ-like love. Addressing misconceptions, we emphasize the importance of a balanced understanding that prioritizes love and respect, especially in avoiding abusive situations. By sharing inspiring stories of perseverance and spiritual growth, we demonstrate how mutual support, prayer, and leading by example are vital for a thriving and respectful marriage. Tune in for insightful discussions on navigating the spiritual and practical aspects of marriage, culminating in heartfelt thanks to our listeners for their unwavering support.
Watch the live show on Youtube.
Follow us on Facebook & Instagram at @marriageinreallifepodcast
well, welcome to welcome to marriage in real life. Oh, yes, yes, yes, well, we're excited. We had a little technical difficulties, but we are here and we're ready to do this. Are you ready to do this, babe? All right, all right, all right. Well, oh man, what's been happening? What's been happening? You know, I know it's been, uh, you know it's been like a crazy, uh, two weeks. It's been a crazy two weeks. Wow, wow, wow, hey. I want to give a shout out to ferg. He's online with us hey, ferg hey, ferg, how you doing.
Speaker 1:Hey, um, you said, um, how many days school is? Uh, the school left.
Speaker 2:I'm left for school um wait a like six six days, give a shout out for six I'm excited about it being over, oh you are oh my god, it's been a very, very overwhelming year. Yeah, it's been. It's been interesting. However, our school did do very well in the testing, so all right we'll give a shout out to peters elementary hey, go pandas, yeah y'all did, y'all did, y'all did it.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, I'm happy for y'all. Y'all did it. So, um, you know, six more days. You ain't got to deal with no more kids for a little bit for a little bit.
Speaker 2:you know, this is a short summer this year because they're trying to regulate our school schedule so they kind of knocking off two weeks. So we go back early. But, the break is so well needed, you know Right. It's going to rush us back, but at least we get this month and a half.
Speaker 1:Right, yeah, and do something. What you going to do?
Speaker 2:I'm going to do something. What are you going to do? I'm going to try to do nothing. I saw some projects around the house that I could probably do oh boy, oh boy, oh boy.
Speaker 1:Oh boy, I've been looking at Home.
Speaker 2:Depot you know, stuff that I can get, so I can, you know, do some things.
Speaker 1:No sir, no, sir, no, sir, I want to give a shout out to Rob G. All right, hey, rob, give a shout out to Malika. Amai says hello. Hey, amai, give a shout out. Got to give a shout out to the muffin. She walking, you know.
Speaker 2:Yeah, man, we went shopping yesterday and she just had to get down and push the cart.
Speaker 1:Wow.
Speaker 2:We let her too.
Speaker 1:We're like, yeah, go for it, go for it. You know, I mean she in church just rearranging the church while I'm preaching. Furniture, yes busy body.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's, that's a good thing. At least we know she's thriving, right, you know, when they're not thriving, then it's a concern.
Speaker 1:But right, yeah, she's doing her thing. All right, we've got to give a double shout out. You know what? One One thing we've got our granddaughter graduated last Wednesday. Yay Aunt.
Speaker 2:Tasia graduated high school.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know, she went through some things you know incarcerated, you know, and everything like that, when she stood it and you know she had told her mama she didn't want to walk because she didn't walk with a class. But mama said, hey, you gotta, you need to walk. Yeah, and I think I was glad that she walked, you know, and I was able to see her walk across the stage, you know, and get a high school diploma. So I'm gonna give a shout out to aunt tage, another shout out.
Speaker 2:Yesterday was memorial day, yeah yeah, it was.
Speaker 1:yes, we were remembered the ones who have fallen, remembered the ones who have fallen and you know they fought for our country and they died in wars, and you know things like that to give us freedom, as I was saying in prayer today, you know that's freedom, that you know that they fought for.
Speaker 2:That we wouldn't have if they didn't.
Speaker 1:I'm telling you, you know, I don't even know we would have a podcast to talk about marriage and especially with prayer and coming to church and doing things. I don't think we would be able to do those, if you know they didn't do what they were supposed to do. So we thank God for the veterans and the families Because, you know, as a family it's a sacrifice right.
Speaker 2:Definitely is. It feels like you're a single parent because you know the husband or the wife is deployed.
Speaker 1:Right right.
Speaker 2:You feel like you're doing a single parent job. Right right right, it can be overwhelming, but it's definitely a good sacrifice for the country. Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.
Speaker 1:All right, so we're ready to talk about this one thing, one thing that we wanted to to make sure we talk about, you know, our little video viral moment. All right, so it's time for a viral moment. All right, here we go. Here we go.
Speaker 4:Marriage, literally, is the one relationship that will bring out the darkest side of you, side that you didn't even know existed. Bring out the darkest side of you Side that you didn't even know existed. Your spouse will bring that out more than anybody. Your parents, your friends, you guys will see parts of you that you didn't know existed. Marriage is from a spiritual construct. It is to help build your character and marriage will help build your character like no other relationship. If you can get through that, you're going to see a side of you that will blow your mind.
Speaker 1:All right, all right, so what you think about that?
Speaker 2:I totally agree with it. Yeah. Absolutely, Because, you know you, it's things about me that I would have never discovered had I not been married. Okay. There's a lot of things that you, you know, encouraged and brought out of me to be like you know. You can do this.
Speaker 1:Right right right.
Speaker 2:I got faith in you that you could do this and even when I was afraid to jump out there and get it done, encouragement really, really helped.
Speaker 1:Okay, all right, yeah, it will bring out something. It'll bring out the worst in you too. Yeah, it is it'll. It is almost like um. It is almost like that um that if you're not careful, it's a mirror to say you know how, you know what's the thing is, what's going wrong with you? If you got anger problems, marriage gonna bring it out oh yeah you know, if you can't communicate, it's gonna bring you out.
Speaker 1:you know, if you are dealing with some things that you haven't dealt with in the past, it's gonna bring out right and uh, you know, maybe you haven't got completely healed. You know, uh, whether maybe somebody you know as a young lady, maybe somebody molested, even as a boy, somebody molested you and you haven't got completely healed. You know you're still a womanizer, you know, and if you ain't got that done, it's going to bring it out. You know, all of those marriages will bring out the bad and the good in you. If you're a loving person, it's going to show that you're loving. If you're a patient person, it's going to show that you're a lover. If you're a patient person, it's going to show that you're patient. You know, you know. And so marriage will bring out the best and the worst in you.
Speaker 2:I agree with that.
Speaker 1:You know it will bring out the best and worst in you.
Speaker 2:The trauma is going to come out, and remember we lash out on the ones that's closest to us, oh yes.
Speaker 1:Usually the husband or your wife, yeah, and Usually the husband or your wife yeah, and if we haven't dealt with it, if we don't know how to deal with anger, you know and you haven't dealt with maybe your father hitting your mother. You know what I mean and that's all you saw and you haven't dealt with that. You didn't go to premarital counseling, or you went to premarital counseling and you wasn't truthful.
Speaker 1:And that's the thing about it is you got to have honesty. Yeah, even when you go to counseling, if you're not honest, it's useful.
Speaker 2:It's useless, it's a waste of time, right?
Speaker 1:I totally agree with that you got to be honest about your feelings. And if your spouse is there, you know, and you're honest about it. You know they love you, they want you to be honest, right, you know, and let us work on this thing together.
Speaker 2:You know, and so some people are afraid to share, to be that vulnerable with someone, even when you're married. You know it's, you know they'll hold on to, you know some stuff because again, I mean, let's say for, for instance, you were molested, that's a shame, you feel shame. So a lot of people don't like to expose their shame, because a lot of people when they are molested, they always think it's their fault.
Speaker 2:That they did something that I caused this to happen to me, so it's a shame that really keeps the person from sharing something like that. I mean, they may hit the tip of the iceberg, but they don't go to the root of the problem, because that's the deep. The depthness of it is where the embarrassment is.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and. But you know, do you think that, in order to have a successful marriage, you got to share that shame? Yeah, so when do you think you're supposed to share that shame? Yeah, so when do you think, uh, you're supposed to share the shame? Do you think you're supposed to share it in premarital counseling? And, uh, or do you one year, two years, five years down the road? When do you? When do you think it's a good time for you to share that shame or that? Or you think that's a shame?
Speaker 2:you think that is all of them I feel like if you're gonna get married, you should be an open book to your partner. They should know everything. They don't know how to support you if they don't know. So if you don't tell them, and then you start lashing out and you end up getting a divorce, you know well what are they supposed to do. No one should really sit back and allow someone else to abuse them verbally or physically. I think if you're going to get married, you should be open. You should be honest about everything. It should be no oops, I forgot to tell you. Oh, did I mention you know, I think once you put everything out there on the table, it's easier to build a foundation and grow from that.
Speaker 1:Okay, but what about trust the table? It's easier to build a foundation and grow from that. Okay, but you but do you? But? But what about trust? I mean, you got to have some trust that your partner is not especially a pre-marriage counseling, that you ain't even married yet and you know I may tell you some things that you may say I don't want to marry you. And at least I got to trust you that you're not going to go around and tell nobody what I just told you. That's a lot of trust, don't you think?
Speaker 2:Yeah, but you got. I mean, if you hiding stuff in the beginning, you're going to hide stuff throughout and in the end. That's just how I feel. Okay. So let's read what Ferg had.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Ferg said. Revealing those things to the one that you should be able to be vulnerable with allows the ability to understand you better. Allows them the ability to understand you better.
Speaker 2:All right, Because, like I've always said, you know, we're not mind readers. That's a gift that God did not give us. We're not mind readers. That's a gift that God did not give us. So if you don't tell me what you're feeling or tell me what it is that you're going through, I don't know. Okay. I don't know, all right.
Speaker 1:All right, yeah, I mean I agree, but I think it just takes a level of trust to tell somebody your deep, dark secrets.
Speaker 2:If you're going to marry him, then yeah, you don't want to go into marriage without that.
Speaker 1:So it goes back to what we were saying If you go into the marriage thinking divorce, then you're going to get divorce. If you go into the marriage that I trust this person and this is a covenant, this is what Lord, this is a covenant then you're going to be open with them and you're going to be able to tell them you know you can't like I guess, like Bishop said you can't go into a marriage saying what if you know, what if she find out? What if she find out, what if we get divorced? You know you got to go in and what is? You know what if we get divorced?
Speaker 2:So you know it is like you don't want to find out anything. You want you want. It's worse if I have to find it out.
Speaker 1:Right, right.
Speaker 2:You know if I stumble across it. And now I know you've known all this time and you didn't tell me. Right yeah. That's well, you know, that's the issue. I think I don't know. What do you guys think? I think that would be an issue.
Speaker 1:I'm going to be talking to Mike.
Speaker 2:I'm sorry, I'm trying to roll my sleeve so it don't fall over my hand, yeah, so that's an issue. If I have to find out on my own, I need you to be up front with me. Right, yeah, okay All right Good Matter of respect.
Speaker 1:Matter of respect. That's what we're talking about tonight Respect, all right. So we've been talking about the foundations of a strong marriage these past couple of weeks, mm-hmm, and our main scripture that we started out with was Psalms 127.1. It says Except the Lord, build the house, they labor in vain. That build it. Except the Lord keep the city, the watchman waketh, but in vain. So this verse teaches us the truth about marriage. You know, again, we talk about buildings, we talk about businesses and all this kind of stuff, but it it has to do with marriages too. So, except the lord build a house, you know, except the lord is the center and the foundation of it, we that labor, we're gonna labor in vain. And even though we we brought up I think you brought up the point that there's some marriages that don't have god as the center, and and, and they are growing and whatever, but we live for god and we know that spiritually they're not on point, you know. And so we want to make god the center, because if god is the center of your marriage, you can get through anything, absolutely you can get through it. And so we want to make sure the lord builds the house. The lord is the foundation we talked about.
Speaker 1:The first thing we talked about was love. All right, and we're not. We're not, when we speak of love, we're not talking about, uh, the kind of love that's portrayed in hollywood movies, the music and all that kind of stuff. Right, because we get. We got some definitions of love that we talked about in first corinthians, 1346, that those ones in the hollywood movies that's there for two hours. You know the actors and things like that. You know it. It really, it really gets me when I hear a couple says man, I thought it was going to be like the movies. You, you know, no, it's not going to, they don't Really. You go to the movies for an hour and a half, maybe two hours with the good movie. They don't portray everything, you know, they show the surface. So even if the marriage goes bad and all of a sudden at the end it's good, they don't show the day-to-day, the minute, the minute. You know they may show, get the surface of trust or the surface of renewal, but they don't really get into it. And how it's to the nitty-gritty man, I'm telling you so, uh, we know that love is more than sex. Love is more than sex. So first corinth, corinthians 13 and 46 that we started.
Speaker 1:We said love is patient. Love is kind. Love does not envy. Love does not boast. Love is not arrogant All right. Love is not rude. Love does not insist on its own way All right. Love is not irritable. Love is not resentful. No, that's what not love. Love does not rejoice at wrongdoing. But what does love do? Love rejoices with the truth.
Speaker 2:And that doesn't hurt, and love doesn't hurt, no, sir.
Speaker 1:You know, you have that, saying it hurts so good, but it's not. Oh boy, love doesn't hurt. No, I don't, only love hurts so good. All right, hey, look, before we go into father, let's look at some of the things. I know we got a little bit delayed, um, you know, and I know there's some people going to be listening to us on our um, apple and spotify and stuff like that, so, but we got a little bit of delay and we see Malika says I think if you're at premarital counseling and we're going back to the video it says.
Speaker 1:I think if you're at premarital counseling and you can't divulge certain information out of fear that you can't trust your partner, getting married isn't going to change that lack of trust.
Speaker 2:Exactly. That's why I say you got to be open and you got to be open and upfront. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:And then Ferg says many have been unhappily or stagnant or a stagnant marriage for decades. But if you want a strong, loving marriage, god must be the center.
Speaker 2:Amen, amen. Both of those comments are great.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Great. You are so right on so many levels, ferd, because you know I found that when Eric and I first got married, we went to church. We were at church and we both knew the Lord. We were raised in church, we knew the Lord. But when we got in and got a relationship, oh yeah, it made a totally difference in our marriage.
Speaker 2:You know, it's like we did nothing without seeking the face of god. Seeking the face of god, and when the enemy came in like a flood and was causing all disturbance in, you know, in our marriage, it was more or less like you know, god put us together, right, not you. Right, god is the center of this, not you. We're going to hang on in there. We're going to pray, we're going to fast. We might be mad at each other, I may sleep upstairs, he may sleep downstairs, and whatever, oh boy, whatever, but at the end of the day, because we are such God seekers, we couldn't walk away from what God had ordained for our marriage, for our family. So being in the center of it is definitely a plus. He must like for us to say God must, must be in the center of it Must be Got to be in the center of it In this day and time.
Speaker 2:You can't, you can't. It's everywhere. Lust it's everywhere. Lust is everywhere. Sin is everywhere. Yes, you know you can't get away from it, no matter you can be driving down the street, it's everywhere. So that strength and that foundation, that love, that kindness that you know, that agape love that it's so important.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it is, it's very important. It's very important, all right. So so, love. And next one we talked about was loyalty. Loyalty, and one of the scripture that we brought up was Ephesians 5,. 31 says, therefore, a man shall leave his wife and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh, all right. And then in the King James it says you got to leave and cleave, you got to be loyal to your wife.
Speaker 1:You know, and I know sometimes you know, especially daddy's girls and mama boys. You know, they got to understand. You know, especially, I think we went into it and say, you know, mothers can't overstep and get involved into the marriage. You know, you got to understand that it's not gone, gone like I don't want nothing to do with it, with you, but he is not at the house and now his family is his wife, her family is her husband, and there's going to be some things that you sometimes, where you say, hey, I want you to come home christmas, whatever, said, well, we can't come. You know, maybe I got to be with her family this time, or maybe you know, as a family, we're going skiing this time or we're doing this. You know, and you can say ah, I wish. But you can't get mad because now he or she is starting traditions of their own, they have their family and they are loyal to that person. Right.
Speaker 1:You know they can't be loyal to mother and father. They have to be loyal to their wife or to their husband. That's what it's all about, you know, with Ephesians 5 and 31. Got to believe and cleave First. What is the mama's boy thing? I can't understand that. Oh yeah, right Well you know, Well, come on, can you explain the mama's boy thing?
Speaker 2:You know some moms, especially single moms, but some moms they have an attachment with their sons. Some moms, their first love of their son's life is their mom. So when they grow up, when they no longer need you, or when they grow up, some of them baby them. But you also have those that help them prepare themselves for their future and it's hard to let go, it's hard to let them go out into the world because you're like, oh my God, that's my baby.
Speaker 2:Especially if they're the last one, that's the mama boy effect. Eric was definitely a mama's boy. Oh, come on.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I was not a mama's boy. How was I a mama's boy? Come on, tell me how was I a mama's boy.
Speaker 2:Because your mom protected you. Oh, she was not letting nobody get their hands on you, nobody get close to you. Your mom protected you a lot.
Speaker 1:Okay, so this is what I understand. How in our marriage, how was a mama's boy, but when you called her she would get on me.
Speaker 2:Well, after we got married, but before then.
Speaker 1:Okay, okay, okay, all right, I ain't going to give you that.
Speaker 2:You can give me that. You can give me that.
Speaker 1:I don't believe I was a mama's boy. But you know, since that's your perspective of it and I can't deny your perspective of me being a mama's boy we had to keep rolling, but this is part of the conversation. We had to keep rolling. This is part of the conversation. We still got time. It's only 7.58. That's what they hear Talk about our conversation. We get this out, you know, by me being a mama's boy.
Speaker 2:Okay all right, you want to deny it, it's fine.
Speaker 1:I'm not going to argue with you about it. Okay, all right, good to go she definitely gave me a hard time.
Speaker 1:Oh, I ain't going to say she didn't give you a hard time, but I don't know if I was a mama's boy Because she got on me All right, all right. So I like that smile. I'm going to hear about it now Want to get off? No, no, respect. That is our subject tonight.
Speaker 1:We're talking about respect. If you're going to have a good foundational marriage, you got to have respect. And we're going to be talking through some verses tonight, that is, you know they're not controversial, but they can really get people mad. When we talk about these verses. We talk about Ephesians 5, 22 and 24, 25 and 26. You know they can really get some people All right. So mutual respect is fundamental for any marriage that expects long term success. It's fundamental. You got to have respect, I have to respect you and you have to respect me. Right, and it goes both ways. A man can't demand respect, especially biblically. You cannot demand respect. Well, I'm the man, you're supposed to give me respect. That shouldn't happen, right, all right, and we're going to discuss that because Ephesians this is what it says in the Bible, ephesians 5, 22,.
Speaker 1:It says wives, and this is where it gets kind of controversial. Not controversial, but I think some men has taken this verse and want a lord over women. Okay, a lord over the, or Lord over wives. All right. It says wives submit to your husbands as to the Lord. All right, for the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its savior. Now, as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Right, that's what. That's what it says, all right.
Speaker 1:And so these verses, these two verses, they are love and they hate it. Some people love them and some people hate them because they don't understand the meaning of them. Right, and I know, especially when we do counseling, I tell people and I tell the husband don't go to Ephesians 5, 22 and 24 and tell the wife this is what you're supposed to be doing. Don't do that. You go to your part of the verse and let her just learn that part, let her understand what it means to submit, let it out, because if you do your part, she's going to do your part. You don't have to demand that she does anything. And so some, you know, because, again, some men love to hang on these verses over the heads of their wives and tell the wives you better submit, because that's what the Bible says. You got to submit, all right, and so you know they demand that they fall down on obedience and they do all of this kind of things. Right, but that's not right.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:I don't really know no men that do that I'll be.
Speaker 1:Look, I know, in, right, I don't really know no men that do that, I'll be, I look, I know, I. I in the old days that's what it was like they would go to these verses and and I mean, we may not know because of who we are, but there are men that does that. They are, they hold this biblical thing and this masculinity thing that he says you know, and so they shouldn't you, you know, no, and you know. And the other side, when, sometimes, when women read these verses, um, um, they feel that they make the wife inferior to the husband, because they say wives, submit to your husband as to the Lord, for the husband is the head of the wife, as even as Christ, you know. So they'd be like man, he's the head of me, all right. Or, you know, now, as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. And so sometimes women can read this I'm not saying all, but sometimes women can read this and may think that they're inferior to their husbands, which they're not.
Speaker 2:and may think that they're inferior to their husbands, which they're not. I think. Like well you know, well I do. I kind of like the way what Berg said you know again. He says submit to what. Give a loving husband a leader, a listener and a plan in all areas and the submission will be natural. I totally agree with that. I don't have a problem being submissive to you if you're leading if you're loving, if we have a plan.
Speaker 2:If you listen, you don't just diss me and throw me out. You know, as the you know I'm not saying what I'm supposed to be saying. I can't say how I feel or anything like that. So I think I agree. If you get all of that in one area, it's easy to.
Speaker 1:It's easy to submit.
Speaker 2:But also, you know, the husband has to submit to their wives as well. I mean, of course. I mean it should be a two-way thing, we should be submitting to one another.
Speaker 1:Okay, all right. Where's that in the Bible?
Speaker 2:It's not in the Bible. It's not in the Bible, but it should not be a two-way street. You know? Here's the thing Men these days aren't the only financial provider for the household. You need two incomes if you're going to live a certain type of lifestyle, you know. So if she ought to go out and she ought to work and he working, it should be some submissions both ways. The Bible should need to verify that this should be done.
Speaker 1:But if we're going to be a biblical church, biblical thing, and we're abiding by the Bible, and if the Bible doesn't say that, then you know maybe that's the wrong word to be submissive.
Speaker 2:So that's why women have a problem with it. That's exactly why women have a problem with it, because it's a one-way street. But then you still need us to make the cookie crumble, so to speak, to pull the cookie together. You still need our support. So that submission thing is a one-way street in the Bible. It's not fair.
Speaker 1:Who said the Bible had to be fair.
Speaker 2:I feel like if I'm going to submit to you, you should be submitting to me as well.
Speaker 1:You sure about that?
Speaker 2:Absolutely One hundred percent.
Speaker 1:All right.
Speaker 2:Because I'm submissive, I don't have a problem with it. But I need you to also be submissive toward me as well. I'm not saying like I'm not the leader, I'm following you because you're the husband, you're the leader, saying like I'm not the leader, I'm following you because you're the you're the husband, you're the leader, you're you're the listener. You don't want the plans. But without you, I mean I can't. Those plans are not going to come to to the full front.
Speaker 1:If I'm not helping, right there you go okay all right, I hear you anybody else got anything to say out there. I'll put it like this, because the word submit in this is to mean to arrange under. That's what it's talking about to arrange under. So God has a special order. Can we agree on that that? God has a special order in the home. God has a special order in the home and so when a godly woman submits, she's understand that that's a reflections of God order in the home. Just like is you know in the church that we know that Jesus is the head of the church and we are to submit to his leadership. So if we, if we, if we understand that, are we saying Jesus is supposed to submit to us?
Speaker 2:No, okay, absolutely not, don't put this on jesus, I'm putting this on 2024. This is what I'm putting this on. I'm not saying that you have to fall underneath me and I be the leader and I be the listener and I be the the planner of all things, in all areas. I'm not saying saying that I'm going to do all that, but I'm saying in certain areas it should be a form of submission to me as well. Let's see what. Rob got to say.
Speaker 1:Rob says submission doesn't have to be a bad thing.
Speaker 2:It doesn't, but I still feel like it should be a two-way street.
Speaker 1:You feel like it, I mean-way street. You feel like it. I mean, that's how you feel, but it's not biblical, right?
Speaker 2:Don't make it wrong, though, just because it's not biblical doesn't make it wrong.
Speaker 1:Hmm, why you say that?
Speaker 2:Because it's not wrong. Okay, so I'll just want you know what I can do, what they did back in the day. I can stay home and make some biscuits they may not be grandma biscuits I can stay home and tend around and build a garden and grow stuff. If that's what you want, that's fine, but that's not what I do and that's not what we need. So if I'm, if I'm, if I'm helping build this foundation, then I think it should be a level of maybe, maybe, maybe it's not, maybe it's a different word that I could use for it, but in the same place, I feel like it should be, it should be, it should go both ways.
Speaker 1:Okay, so maybe submissive is the bad word. I mean, it's not the right word, I don't know, we're working as a team. Right, we're working as a team.
Speaker 2:Yeah, because at the end of the day, I'm still going to be under you, I'm still going to let you lead. I mean, I'm not going to let you lead, but I'm going to allow you to do your part and what God called you to do. But in the same instance, would I get a pat on the head like I'm a dog?
Speaker 1:No, that's what I'm saying.
Speaker 2:And that's what women feel like. That's why women have a problem with it. And Rob is so right. The word submission it don't have to be a bad thing, but the way men have generated it over the years has caused women to see it as a bad thing. And that's what I said in the beginning.
Speaker 1:Right, that's what I said in the beginning. Right, that's what I said in the beginning that men use this verse to be domineering over women. Right, and that's what I said in the beginning, right didn't.
Speaker 2:I say that first, says what patsy is saying, that sometimes men listen to your woman. She has good ideas and does something better than you, and we know a woman's intuition and that's real.
Speaker 1:That's what I'm talking about all right, so the husband is not to demand submission from his wife, right what?
Speaker 2:What do you mean demand?
Speaker 1:The husband is not to demand submission from his wife. Am I right? Because you said he can?
Speaker 2:demand it if he want to, if he get it. Now, that's going to be the question if he get it, but demanding it.
Speaker 1:So this submission is as to her own husband, only, only so. Women are not to be subvert. So you know some servants to men. They are equals even in the home right, but god has invested leadership into the husband I'm not saying that I want to lead.
Speaker 2:I I never said that, but I said it should be a level of where you submit to me as well.
Speaker 1:So you think, I think the word submit, I think it should be a level of, because we're talking about respect, so there should be a level of respect for you.
Speaker 2:Absolutely.
Speaker 1:Submission to me is only but respect, respecting God's order, right, and I should respect you Right. That's what. That's what I should respect you. What do you think about that? Do you agree with that? I should respect you enough to say, look, if I, if I, if both of us are working and I come home first, I should cook.
Speaker 2:That's respect. Well, Rob said seek wise counsel from a wife is what husbands need to do. I agree. I agree. He also said I think the issue is, if it's not a biblical submission, then it's not fair for a man or a woman.
Speaker 1:Hmm, you said. I think the issue is, if it's not a biblical submission, then it's not fair. Okay, alright, okay, this is one thing I know. Go ahead. Go ahead, say what you got to say.
Speaker 2:Oh, I was going to say our next point, but go ahead.
Speaker 1:No, but I'm saying this is a contentious, as we say. This is a contentious thing that, as I said before, many men they take these verses which they shouldn't. They take these verses and they take them as domineering and sometimes, as you said, women take them and think that they shouldn't. They take these verses and they take them as domineering and sometimes, as you said, women take them and think that they're inferior. But it's God's submission, knowing that, look, men and this is what I want men to understand that in the end we're going to have to give an account for the actions as the head of the home, when we stand before Jesus. Okay.
Speaker 1:We got to give an account. So how the house runs, god's going to hold us responsible, right, but that head responsibility does not mean that we domineer our wife. We respect each other and so if we? Respect each other, and so if we respect each other, it comes back to what you said. If I'm and we're going to talk about it, and I think we're getting ahead but if I'm doing godly, it's easy for you to respect me in a way that I'm going to follow you.
Speaker 2:Absolutely.
Speaker 1:If I respect you. When you say something, I say, okay, let me listen to it, Let me go in there and let's work on this thing together. So I think it's a matter of mutual respect. Can you agree with that?
Speaker 2:Yeah, okay. Hey. Marie. All right, all right, I would say submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Yes, yes, I love that, harold. I love that.
Speaker 2:Because the bottom line it comes down to following Christ at the end of the day. So you know, to be submissive it's okay Malaka put. This submit thing was hard for me in pre-marriage counseling. I can only imagine, especially when you're so used to handling your own and doing your own thing and you know you ain't got to be accountable for nobody else but you. So you got that independent thing going on and then now you're trying to become one.
Speaker 2:And now you got to submit and you got to. You know, and a lot of women sometimes, that submission make us feel like we have to get permission and it's like I'm grown why I need to get permission.
Speaker 1:Because I would tell you Wait a minute.
Speaker 2:I'm not finished.
Speaker 1:Okay, go ahead.
Speaker 2:So a lot of times, you know, when you're going from being that independent person to now you're one, it's like, hey, I want to go and do it so, so, but I got it, I got it. I got to check with Jordan and make sure it's OK with him. Or even like, so you know, even me, being married 32 years, the ladies that Rick was like, hey, you want to go, do you want to go do some something? After hours at Rick I was like, yeah, but you know, I got to check with my husband, make sure he ain't got no plans for me so that way I can do this. But you know, and vice versa, when Eric get ready to go hang out with his homeboy, he'll be like, hey, babe, can I go do so-and-so? So, yeah, I get that, I get that. Malika yeah, I get that, I get that. My life yeah, I get that.
Speaker 2:I'm sure it was but you know, when you get a moment, how did you, how did you change from that? I mean, how did you go about submitting when, after you had already been such an independent person and handling your own thing, so, yeah, you could type that and call that in too.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that'd be good, all right, no, so now being such an independent person and handling your own thing. So, yeah, you could type that in call at the end too. Yeah, that'd be good, all right. So now we saw those verses. Now it says look, ephesians five or 28 and 29.
Speaker 1:This is what I tell the husbands to do. In the same way, husbands should love the wise as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. You get that. He who loves his wife loves himself. You get that. He who loves his wife it's not he who loves himself loves his wife. You see how much importance God puts on loving your wife. That men have to do Because he says he who loves his wife loves himself. Not he who loves himself loves his wife. Right, for no one, because he said, for no one ever hated his own flesh but nourishes and cherishes, just as Christ does, the church. That goes back to what you're saying. If the husbands love their wives as their own bodies because they don't hate their own bodies, right, then respect and submission is going to happen. Right, it's going to happen.
Speaker 1:All right. And so what we do, we willingly submit to the Lordship of Jesus in our lives. And because what? Because we know that he loves us. All right, and so that's the same thing that you, like you said in the beginning what a wife would do, they would willingly submit or willingly respect their husband if the husband is doing what they're supposed to be doing, as following Christ, right, right, loving their wives and all that. And so that's why, when people say that, well, you shouldn't get divorced because they beating on you, no, I go to this verse. I say, in the same way, husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. And if they're not doing that, that's a sense of divorce. You can say, look, you're beating on me because you don't love me, you know, even though they go to the Gospels and say, well, there's got to be adultery. No, look at this. Here it says if, in the same way, husbands should love their wives as their own body, he who loves his wife loves himself. Right, I agree with that.
Speaker 1:So right, so, um, we respond. We respond to love by submitting to jesus, and that will happen when us, you know, a wife will submit to them yeah, all right.
Speaker 2:So, like I said, I don't have to ask permission. I ask out of respect for him, because I want to keep him around, and I want you to keep him around too she said it is a courtesy.
Speaker 1:It is, it's a courtesy yeah, it's not an act that you like. You say it's not. Um you asking can I go? You know it's when you're saying can I? It's not, I need your permission to go, it's a courtesy it's out of respect out of respect.
Speaker 1:You know that, hey, you, my, you, my wife, you my husband, and I respect you enough to say, hey, is it all right that I, because you, you never know what plans you have, you never, you know whatever you may, what. So it's a courtesy thing, you know, they, they, you know, back in the day, the, the ogs would say you know you whipped, you know what I mean. Hey, I would rather be whipped with my wife than to be whipped with y'all jokers out there. You know what I mean. So one of the reasons, a lot of reasons, why some wives have a hard time submitting to their mate is because the man is anything but christ-like in love. For that's it. That's it in a nutshell, right, if, if, is that if you, if you're not, if the husband is not christ-like in love, it goes back to your beginning. I'm not gonna, you're not going to respect me.
Speaker 2:That's what it's all about respect.
Speaker 1:It's all about respect. But this, you know, if we talk about it and we go to say the old school, the old school would say you know, you got to be there, you got to do that, you know, no matter what, you know your husband, that's your husband, you got to stay there. And this is what this is. This is where the old school goes. And they miss they. They reread this. You know it's a lot about that.
Speaker 1:Paul wrote about from him being single, but peter also wrote about it. And again, what I'm, what I'm trying to say is that I know from being on Twitter and from being in the spaces that I am is that a lot of this masculinity ruins marriages and they get to these scriptures and they lord over. They get these scriptures and they misinterpret these scriptures and they only read one part of the scripture but they don't read that part about loving your wife as you love yourself, as Christ loved the church, and that supersedes all of this other stuff. Like in 1 Peter, 3 and 1 to 6, it says wives, obey your husbands. Some of your husbands may not obey the word of God by being your husbands. They become more Christians by the life you live without you saying anything, Alright. So that's why you know you get those unsaved husbands. And the old school would tell you you better stick it out, just keep praying for them.
Speaker 1:But if they beating on you, you ain't got to keep praying for them. You're gone, you know. But they'll go to this thing here. They will see how you love God and how your lives are pure.
Speaker 1:Do not let your beauty come from the outside. It should not be the way you comb your hair, or the wearing of gold, or the wearing of the clothes. Your beauty should come from the inside. It should come from the heart. This is the kind that lasts. Your beauty should be a gentle and quiet spirit. In God's sight, this is of great worth and no amount of money can buy it.
Speaker 1:This was the kind of beauty seen in the holy women who lived many years ago. They put their hope in God. They also obeyed their husbands. Zedek obeyed Sarah, obeyed her husband Abraham. She respected him as the head of the house. You are her children if you do what is right and do not have fear.
Speaker 1:And so men take this and they just go crazy with it. Women read it and they say I got to stay there until he killed me. You know, and they not, they not understanding that. Look, no, no, what did Paul say? He says look, you got to submit to Christ and if you love Christ. Christ says that Christ died for our sins, so that, literally, you, at the point where you would die for your wife, if you love her that much, you would die for her. And so are we going to do this thing biblically? Are we going to do that First the husband? Who're going to do this thing biblically? If we're going to do that first the husband, who is going to be held accountable at the end? You got to be the first partaker of this thing. You have to be a godly man.
Speaker 2:Amen, let's go to some comments.
Speaker 1:Y'all go through some comments.
Speaker 2:Let me go up top, okay. So let's start with Ferg. He said please understand that if your spouse isn't doing what they're supposed to do according to the word, it doesn't negate you doing what you were told to do according to the word. All right. It's like this. It's like this person is in the hospital because of cocaine. So, as a Christian, I don't have to show them love. Yeah, you have to show them love.
Speaker 1:It's like this person in the hospital because of cocaine. So, as a Christian, I don't have to show them. Of course you have to show them love.
Speaker 2:Yeah, marie puts sounds like my mom when she always quotes honor your mother and father, but she keep forgetting the rest. Yeah, you know, I understand, I understand way, for I understand what he means about um, still doing your part. When I was was a young, I want to say a teenager, maybe around 16, no, maybe younger than that, maybe 14, there was this lady that lived across the street from us to go to church every Sunday. So you get up on Sunday morning, get dressed, go walk down the street because we had, you know, a few churches in the neighborhood. So she would go down to the church and I would watch her every Sunday. But every Friday night, you know, me and my homegirl would be sitting on the front porch. You know, just chilling.
Speaker 2:And there's her husband drunker than a skunk.
Speaker 2:I mean so, so drunk. Sometimes people would be dragging him home. You know he would get off from work on Friday and go drink up his whole paycheck and then come in, but she stayed right there with him. He got up the next morning. But let me tell you something this is a weekend thing, because on Monday morning he was fresh and ready to start his week and you know so, on Friday when he get paid, he just do it all over again.
Speaker 2:And I just stated to myself I would never put up with a man. I would have left him a long time ago. What's wrong with him? You know he was an alcoholic, it was a wrap for him. But this lady stuck it out with this man, and I mean like year after year after year. There he would go in and out. You know, as I got older I was still watching him, like now I'm from 14, I'm 20, I'm 21, I'm 22, I'm 23. This man is still doing this. And all lo and behold, one day he went to church. One Sunday, I saw him going to church and that.
Speaker 2:Holy.
Speaker 1:Spirit got him, and that was it. That was it.
Speaker 2:I never saw that man drunk falling down, drunk people dragging him home again, drunk falling down drunk people dragging him home again. She stuck it out with him. I don't know if I would have been able to do that. I just my patience. No, I don't think I would have been able to do that, but back then that's what women was instructed to do.
Speaker 1:So they was going about his verse. But I guess the thing is is that apparently he wasn't beating on her or doing something destructive. He was just on the weekend. He would get drunk.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but he wasn't leading, he wasn't being a loving husband.
Speaker 1:Well, how do you know he wasn't being a loving husband?
Speaker 2:I mean, how are you going to lead if you're drunk?
Speaker 1:Well, this is on the weekend, 72 hours.
Speaker 2:Well, monday, tuesday, wednesday, thursday, he's probably doing his thing, I don't know, I just don't know if I would have been able to do it.
Speaker 1:You would have been able to do it Right, right.
Speaker 2:And he ended up becoming one of the deacons of one of the churches in the neighborhood, but it was years. It was years.
Speaker 2:Years, my family moved to that neighborhood. If he was you know what I'm saying, If he had already been drinking years, but probably since I was 10. Right, you know, I don't know, I don't. I don't know if I would have been able to do that. And that's where we are. When we bring that to um, we bring it to 2024. You got a lot of women that ain't putting up with that. No, we, we, not we not putting up with that. That's just too much.
Speaker 1:Okay, all right. So verses 28 through 29 teach us that the husband is to love his life like he loves his own. Husbands are to nourish their wives and they are to cherish their wives All right. So we're going to be. Nourishing, that means to bring to maturity. So a godly husband helps his wife to reach her fullest potential in God. He helps her to grow by meeting her needs and by being an encouragement to her. So that's what you're talking about nourish. A godly man does that, brings it, because a godly man should be studying the Word. He shouldn't be having Bible study. You know, a godly man should be able to go into the word, and not saying that a wife can't be going into the word, can't do that, but he has to lead.
Speaker 1:I agree with that he has to lead, because again he's going to be held accountable. And I don't think I want to again stand in front of God and and and they say, well, why you let Patsy do everything? You should have been praying, you should have been doing that. I don't want to stand in front of that, I want to be. You know, like we often say, we go to, we go to conferences and things like that, and we separate. You know where the men are talking to the men and women talking and, and on your side we always talk about at the end and we separate. You know where the men are talking to the men and the women are talking to them, and on your side, we always talk about it at the end and we say, well, what y'all talked about.
Speaker 1:You know, just an overview, and you always say, well, they want to say we got to be praying for y'all. You know we're praying for the men, praying for the men. You say, well, what y'all talked about? I say, well, talk, talk about ministry. We should be praying. We should be praying for our houses, we should be praying for our children. That's what our obligation is. We're so worried about the wife praying for us but who's praying for?
Speaker 1:the wife. Hopefully you are, but I'm just saying, when we go to the conferences, they don't talk about what you know. You should be kneeling down praying for your wife, speaking life. That's what it's all about nourishing you, bring her to maturity. You say, look, I'm not going to be studying the Word, studying the Word and leaving you behind. No, we're going to do this thing together and I'm going to lead. I'm going to lead and if, like you said before and you keep saying, if I'm being godly, you're going to follow me. That's the thing about it. That's it. We follow Christ because Christ loved us so much that he gave his life for us. Right, he loved us, so he gave his life. And you got to be able to see. If we're going to say, as Christ loved the church, you got to be able to see that in me that I would give my life for you.
Speaker 2:And if you give your life for me you will respect me and you will follow me. We're right there, all right.
Speaker 1:All right, what? Let me see Rob G asked this question. Well, for example, women are still instructed by the word All right, yeah. And you know men need to do their thing too. You know women are instructed by the word to respect and submit, but men are instructed by the word to nourish and love.
Speaker 1:Right Now you go to first Peter. Peter is telling them. You know, in essence, that if you don't, if the man is not doing what he's supposed to do, you still supposed to be um submission, but the but. The part about that that people don't understand is that if you're beating or you're not being as a husband, how long you stay is between you and God. Okay.
Speaker 1:Right, if he's beating on you, you should not stay with him because 1 Peter tell you to show love Because he's not loving you Like Rob's. Actually, outside of infidelity and abuse, are there reasons for divorce? What do you think Outside of infidelity and abuse abuse are there reasons for divorce?
Speaker 2:well, you know, I mean, well, reverse is no. But if you got a crackhead that's stealing everything out the house, selling the tv, selling the groceries, selling the, selling the kids stuff, I mean like, what are you supposed to do? I mean like, come on, like what are you supposed to do? Kick them out, kick them out and don't divorce them. But you know, I think it depends on the situation. I know that the Bible specifically says infidelity and of course you know, specifically says infidelity and of course you know, if you don't, you know no one should be, hurting anyone physically.
Speaker 2:So that's definitely a sign. I don't know if that's particularly in there, but that's definitely one. But what about? What about emotional abuse? What about emotional abuse? Because sometimes people look at abuse as physical. As you rolling up in the church in sunglasses because you you got a black eye or, you know, are you wearing a hat? To preach because you got clunked with the frying pan.
Speaker 2:You know, you know, people look for the visible, the visual scars, versus the, the ones that are in the heart and in the head. You know, and so I don't know, I, I, I don't know, I don't know the answer to that question based based upon the bible, it would be yes, that's the only reason yeah, no, you got two reasons.
Speaker 1:You know infidelity. Mm-hmm Right and abuse. And abuse. You know everything else you should be able to work. I mean, you could work infidelity and you could work out abuse too.
Speaker 2:But what if you? Okay, let's say, for instance, let's say, when you got married, you and this person, y'all did not even know Christ, mm person, y'all did not even know christ. And let's say, as, while you're together, you, you learn of christ and you both get you know, give your life to christ, but then you find out that y'all have absolutely nothing in common, nothing we at what. You know what I'm saying? It's like like you got married, you weren't saved, and now maybe one person's saved and the other person's not saved, maybe they both get saved at the same time, but then they realize that this is not. My soulmate lived over there on 31st Street.
Speaker 1:So you're saying, when the Bible says, what God joined together, let no man put asunder, you're saying that God did.
Speaker 2:They probably got married at a courthouse, yeah it don't matter if it's a courthouse or whatever. Well, because the courthouse doesn't say that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I know, but you're saying that two of them are non-believers. They got married, so it's not like God put them together, right? Or are you saying they got married for sex? You know what I'm saying? They got married not because God put them together, but because they were just wanting, or maybe they got.
Speaker 2:Maybe they dated through high school, maybe they.
Speaker 1:Maybe they got dated, because Maybe they met in college and they or maybe the girl got pregnant and they got married.
Speaker 2:Why does it have to be something? Why just can't? They just can't date and and say they're in love, and then they get married.
Speaker 1:Well, if they, in love love, can conquer all this stuff.
Speaker 2:It's also temporary. Why do you? Say that Because I mean you know, when you thinking about like okay, how many, I mean I true love, is that love that's going to stand the test of time. How many girlfriends have you had that you were in love with or that you said you were in love with? How many guys that I dated that I said I was in love with?
Speaker 1:But I was using the wrong term of love. We didn't understand what love was. That's why we could tell our teenage boys and teenage girls you don't know what love is. Oh, I love him. You don't know what love is. You know how to. Oh, I love him. You don't know what love is. You don't know. Because that's not true love, that's not. That's infatuation, that's not even love, that's infatuation.
Speaker 2:Infatuation. I can agree with that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know, but when you truly love somebody, you know you stick with them, Right? That's what I believe. So you know, you agree with that. Okay, all right, good to go. Anybody talking? Anybody out there? All right, it's almost time for us to wrap up. It's almost time for us to wrap up. It's 835. And you know, again, you can go back and listen to us on the podcast, apple and Spotify and iHeart, all right.
Speaker 1:So number two is that he is to cherish, he's supposed to cherish his wife to soften with heat. You know, the husband is to give tender love to his spouse. Tender love, tender love. You're so special. I don't forget how this song go All right. And so in first Peter and this this is another verse that a lot of people, a lot of people mess up. You know, first Peter, three and seven says you know that. You know the women are a weak vessel, but that doesn't mean they're not inferior or weak. That just means the phrase refers to a vessel that is delicate. So women are delicate, you know they're diamonds, and so that's how we got to treat our wives like they delicate, handle them with. You know like they delicate, handle them with you know like they delicate, you know, like you know that. So that's where we are on that. Anybody else, anybody want to call in and give their take on what we talked about tonight, or, you know, just want to.
Speaker 2:So first is marriage licensing weren't a thing until 1639, but god's word started a little while before that and we can't add to his word okay yeah, god's word been in existence from that you know I'm not adding to his word
Speaker 1:yeah but they didn't have marriage license. But think about it. They would do all kind of things to know that there was a husband and wife. There may not be no legal marriage, but they were no documentation. They didn't have to get licensed to marry, but they had to do some things. What happened with Rebecca and Leah? When old boy tried to? You know he worked for his wife but he didn't get the right one. So they did something in order for you to acknowledge that you were married. It just wasn't no courthouse Right.
Speaker 2:So you know it's not like certificates and stuff, but it was cartwheels had a festival brain, the biggest yeah, yeah gonna have a wedding celebration we're gonna have a wedding celebration, that's the wedding where jesus um may turn the water into wine. Who was getting married?
Speaker 1:Oh, I don't know. Must be somebody that knew Jesus.
Speaker 2:Yeah, the Bible doesn't say who wedding it was. It just said it was a wedding.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and it said his mom was there.
Speaker 2:And she was there, turned up, as Jamal Bryant said he turned up.
Speaker 1:Don't get me started on that, don't even get me started on him, don't even get me started on him.
Speaker 1:Don't even get me started, all right. So if you want to call yeah, yeah, women are diamonds hey, if you want to call in, you can call into 754-222-2219. 754-222-2219. We have a couple of more minutes that if you want to express your thoughts about respect, respect. We hit it tonight and we had a good conversation about respect. You know our wives' respect and husbands' respect. You know we respect. I put it like this you know, I tell you the Holy Spirit, we are showing respect for our wives. When we are led by the Holy Spirit, we show them respect when we are led Absolutely.
Speaker 1:And we treat them like, we nourish them and everything like that. And it goes back to again to what you said in the beginning If we do what we're supposed to do as godly men, our wives will respect us.
Speaker 2:It'll be easy to follow. Yeah, and I say all the time as long as you follow Christ wholeheartedly, then I don't have a problem Doing my part. Okay.
Speaker 1:I like that. I give you a clap on that. Let's cheers.
Speaker 1:Alright, so we're going to have a few more minutes. You can call in 754-222-2219. We want to take a couple of calls. We have five minutes, if not we'll be moving on, but we want to take a couple of calls. Call into 754-222-2219 and get your. You know your thoughts on about tonight, what you thought about tonight, your thoughts about what we talked about. Respect what his name put, some respect on my name. You say something about that every time. Yeah, man, because he was. You know, respect is a respect me.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm, but sometimes you got to give it in order to receive it back. If you're disrespectful, the person that you're being disrespectful to is going to match your energy. They're going to be disrespectful to you.
Speaker 1:So what's your definition of respect? What do you mean when you say respect? When you say respect, what do you mean? What do you mean when you say respect? When you say respect, what do you mean?
Speaker 2:What do you mean when I say respect? I said disrespect. Mm-hmm. You don't, you want. I don't want you being rude with me or being shady with me or, you know, being nasty toward me, not being supportive of me. That's not respect.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:That's why I say you know, if you and that's really in any situation you don't have to be with people who are married, respect is respect. You give respect where it's due and if you're being disrespectful, then you know that person is going to be disrespectful to you.
Speaker 1:Right, I agree, I agree, yeah, I totally agree. You know they're going to be disrespectful for you if you don't respect you know, if you're not loving God, you know your wife ain't going to respect you because she'll be like you ain't loving God. I'm out here praying and you ain't praying. We don't want that. We don't want that. We don't want that. All right, well, we're getting ready to get on off of here. We want to thank you, give a shout out to everybody who participated. You know we got to thank God for Ferg we love. You know, uh, that you uh was in there. Uh, he was saying that. He says, he says his point is that they didn't, uh didn't or could or could divorce because of the reasons that we're discussing today. Okay, all right, all right, yeah, they have, you know, different reasons to divorce they. You know there wasn't no beating and all that kind of stuff. It was like Jesus said, it was adultery, that was it. But we understand. You know, abuse is just one thing. Want to give a shout out to Samson.
Speaker 2:I heard you say the line was busy.
Speaker 1:The line is busy.
Speaker 2:Something going on with that. I don't see where it's at.
Speaker 1:Your line is busy. Something going on with that? I don't see where the line is busy. Nope, I don't see where the line is busy.
Speaker 2:Thanks, harold. Thank you for chiming in there, that was awesome.
Speaker 1:Hey, I got you set up.
Speaker 2:I got you set up. Thanks a lot.
Speaker 3:What'd you say? Oh, I was just saying, you stopped telling people thank you, so I was following up?
Speaker 1:yeah, I was. I wanted to make sure that um remember it was something going on yeah, but it looks like it's all good now.
Speaker 1:If you try it again, I don't, but I don't see like it's all good Now. If you try it again, I don't, but I don't see that it's busy. I don't think that it's busy. I can make sure that everything is a-okay in that, and we want you to call in. We got just a couple of minutes.
Speaker 1:I like to hear from Ferg, I like to hear when he talk and drop some nuggets. You know, that's what I like to hear, but if we got to move on, we got to move on. We want to thank you, each and every person, for joining us. Uh, tonight, as I often say, you know you could have been doing something else, but you decided to. You know, just join us, you know. And so this is a good thing. Respect is a good thing. All right, respect is a good thing, you know. So, if you want to help us, you know, to create more programming is right there. You could give by cash app or you can give by Zelle. You can help us, you know, just to further this marriage ministry and we would love for you to give. That's a way that you can give. All right, all right. Well, it is time to go.
Speaker 1:I enjoyed our conversation tonight. Again, we want to thank each and every person who joined us tonight. Um, we, we love you all. We, we really do, and uh, we, we respect you all and we respect your time and we want to say good night, don't forget. Please like, stop what you're doing right now and like, please like this video right there so it can go viral. All right, like and be sure to go on Apple Podcasts, spotify, iheart, amazon Music and just listen and make sure you comment. Please make sure you comment and we will respond to your comments. And maybe you want to say some more things and we will respond to your comments. All right, you ready to go, aren't you? You ready to go? Aren't you Time to go? You ready to go? I see that you ready to go, ain't you?
Speaker 2:Good night.